In what may become a regular feature, it’s time to check in on the latest MAGA/Q nuttiness. And certainly, the Maui wildfires, specifically those in the town of Lahaina, have brought out the worst of them.
This Facebook post, featured on the ParlerWatch subreddit, features a bunch of conspiracies new to me.
It’s amazing how the “do your own research” crowd will come up with the most fantastical, evil-villain schemes to explain stuff that is easily verified by the truth. Let’s dig in!
Hawaii is another test run to see how easy it is to murder civilians and watch and see if the masses will rise up. As of now it looks like it’s pretty easy. Kill everyone. Shut down your ability to say anything with a media black out. No internet. Nobody allowed to enter the scene of the crime. No investigations.
Of course, there are investigations. And more investigations. The state is even having a nonprofit investigate the government’s response. And there are private lawsuits that are also probing the causes of the disaster. This is deep-blue Hawaii, not Florida. No one is afraid to dig into the facts to find both who’s at fault and ways to avoid making the same mistakes again.
Media blackout? I guess no one is covering the “Jewish space laser” angle, which appears to be the only kind of coverage this crowd wants. And the internet works fine, thanks.
It’s just a wild fire believe us we are the government. We are here to help clean up the mess we made. It’s the Bill Gates playbook. Creat the problem fake the solution. Take everything. Make huge profits. Sick Sick world we live in. Wake the fuck up!!!
One thing is true: This was not “just a wild fire.” It’s the kind of climate-change-fueled disaster that is becoming increasingly common because people like this would rather believe in bizarre conspiracy than in the climate disaster that scientists have been warning us about for decades. We don’t need Jewish space lasers when we have unchecked carbon emissions.
And Bill Gates definitely gets it from the COVID-19 anti-vaxxers. “A thematic analysis of the first cluster found it to be dominated by comments alleging that Bill Gates is an evil person with a hidden agenda,” one study of Facebook disinformation found. “Comments also connected Gates to seemingly unrelated conspiracy theories, such as the theory that Covid-19 is caused by the rollout of 5G networks … Within this cluster, comments also posited a connection between Gates and convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein … and proposed Gates is seeking to microchip people through vaccinations.”
And that’s not all! “A common theme was that Gates is motivated by a ‘depopulation agenda,’” the study found. “The population control theory was interwoven with ideas about Gates’s controlling individuals through microchipping and the ‘Mark of the Beast’ (a physical mark left by the smallpox vaccines).”
These loons literally think Gates created COVID-19 as a pretext to implant microchips via a vaccine, as if there aren’t a million other easier ways to carry out the microchipping agenda if that really were the goal.
“Hi, Maude. Can you come in for some routine blood work?” There, done. And without the global disruptions and mass death caused by the pandemic.
But of course, I would say that. I’m microchipped and under Gates’ control.
Everyone knows the blue car situation proof by itself.
Um, what? No, everyone doesn’t know about this, so I looked it up. And holy shit, they don’t just think a space laser destroyed the town, but they also believe that blue cars were spared!
Campaign Action
“Social media posts sharing the post typically include a video from a TikTok account that often shares clips of everyday items being burned by a handheld industrial laser in a workshop. The clip shows the laser burning yellow, red and green fabric, while a blue swatch is unscathed, with text saying it can be programmed for ‘different wavelengths,’” reported the Associated Press. “They contrast this footage with imagery from Lahaina, the historic Maui town that was largely leveled by the wildfire, noting a blue car and some blue beach umbrellas around Front Street, along the waterfront, were not destroyed in the inferno.”
Their “evidence” comes from drone footage of the devastation, and they claim only blue things were left unscathed. But if you watch the video (which they clearly haven’t), there’s plenty of green and red things left standing as well. Notably, we see a row of closed blue umbrellas and two blue cars seemingly unscathed while everything around them is burned. But that same corner also has a gray car and a white car, both unburned. And we see people walking down the street, so for all we know, those intact cars were driven in after the fire.
Furthermore, there are a lot of burned-out husks of cars. In Hawaii, 9% of cars are blue. There are undoubtedly blue cars among the husks.
But also … why? Why would the Jews or Bill Gates or “make huge profits” guys program their space laser to avoid some blue umbrellas? Was it our special, secret, blue Democratic armor to protect ourselves from our own weapon? And if so, why didn’t all the liberals in Lahaina get the memo to paint their roofs blue, trade in their cars for blue editions, and wear blue baseball caps?
And if that really was a liberal weapon, why would we strike a liberal city in one of the most liberal states instead of, say, Midland, Texas (where former President Donald Trump got 77% of the vote in 2020)?
But more importantly if you could take a second and think. I know that’s hard liberals. Here is my proof. Look through every picture of the cars burned to a crisp and realize that none of the car doors are open. If a fire so hot was coming to me I know I wouldn’t just sit in my car and roast. I would have ran for the ocean. Not one of the car doors are open. To me that means they were taken out so fast by ?????????? You all know by what. This is murder!!!!
What a weird theory. Do you ever walk out of a car and leave the door open? It’s a second-nature instinct. No one consciously thinks, “Oh yeah, I forgot to close the door. Silly me!” It just happens. Walk out, shut the door. And I won’t fall into the trap of doing a frame-by-frame analysis of the video, but I can see at least one car with its driver’s door open. It means nothing.
When the fire swept into town, Maui was experiencing wind gusts of up to 67 mph. Lahaina is just a few miles long. At those speeds, it wouldn’t take long for fire to sweep through the town, which is exactly what happened.
It’s tragic that so many people would rather fit real-world disasters into their conspiracy frames than accept reality and embrace solutions that would mitigate a repeat in the future.
